A memoir of musings, allegories and adventures covering my inspired life...

Monday, July 4, 2011

Top 10 Things THIS mom wants…

As a single mother of a now 14 year old boy, there are some luxuries in life which I have yet to experience.  Since every motivational coach in the world says you must write down what you want out of life in order to achieve it, I will make my declarations here in my blog…but only the ones that relate to parenting for now…and in a top ten format because it makes a tidy little list.

Top 10 Things THIS mom wants…
10.  A chauffeur…for my son.  This would probably free up 2 hours a day for me.  Just sayin’

9.    To go to the restroom with reading material…and NOT be immediately startled by pounding on the door and the words “It’s really important!” or, “I need to ask you something real quick.”

8.    To not discover a lingering pair of underwear or dirty socks in the room after being reassured that ALL of the dirty clothes had been collected.  Or better yet, to not find clean clothes in the laundry hamper (still on hangers mind you) because it’s easier to add them to the dirty pile than to hang them in the closet.  Or better still, to pull a clean load out of the dryer and not discover candy, change, super bouncy balls or dried up lizards.  Don’t even get me started…I have a laundry list of laundry issues to deal with.

7.    To be able to leave my house without ever EVER having to ask the following questions again:
       -Did you feed the dogs?  Did you give them fresh water?
       -Did you brush your teeth?
       -Did you put on deodorant?
       -Did you change your underwear?

6.    A closed refrigerator door, a bread bag tied closed after use, a toilet seat that’s dry when people sit, an area in the front room clear of boys shoes, ripstick, school bag and the like (I know, I cheated a little here by combining multiple items into one, but can you blame me?  This list is looong baby!)

5.   A new discovery by the government revealing that video games are hazardous to your mom’s mental health, and therefore there shall be a mandated ban enforced immediately.

4.    To make it through a checkout line at the store without being solicited for impulse items

3.    To make a valid point without receiving a conspicuous (and original) eye roll in response

2.    To have a phone conversation sans the peanut gallery interrupting me to offer its two cents

1.   “Dear Ms. Miller, We are pleased to inform you that, through due diligence, hard work, and an impeccable high school transcript, your brilliant son Brandon has earned a full scholarship to our prestigious university for as many years as necessary to complete his post graduate degree.  We would also like to present you with a lifetime supply of chocolate and coffee to express our appreciation for allowing us the privilege and honor of furthering your son’s education.”
Brandon pretending he doesn't want to hug me...but he really does...
he better if he knows what's good for him. :o)